StickGirl Joins the Gym

You may have noticed a lack of posting from me since the New Year, and that's because I've been busy doing silly New Year things like joining the gym.

Yes. I've finally crumbled and have joined that awful, cheery, brightly lit place they call The Gym. I thought it was a good idea at the time. I was so motivated that first week, I almost became one of Them. I even went out and bought Shiny New Gym Clothes!

But then the second week rolled around and I went back to normal. So now I'm just paying a ridiculous amount of money every month, that quite frankly could be spent on shoes.

The other week I went to a Body Pump class - supposed to be good for your arms and back. And let's face, these spaghetti arms need it. I had to lift weights in that class. Yes, I StickGirl, lifted weights.

Pause for laughter.

But then the weights got too heavy and I was stuck at the FRONT OF THE CLASS with the BAR ABOVE MY HEAD and I couldn't put it down because it was TOO HEAVY (sounds like that doesn't makes sense, and actually yes, it doesn't make sense - but that should give you an idea of my state of panic!) and everyone carried on with their squats and crazy weight lifting while little old weedy arms (that's me) was frozen with a massive bar of weights (ok, just small weights) up in the air! Eventually the instructor just told me to put the bar down, so I did. Bad times.

I got lots of consolatory smiles from the older ladies in the class, and a few even talked to me afterwards to find out 'how I got on'. Bad times I tell you.

So the moral of the story is: buy shoes not gym membership.

Friday the 13th

Incase you didn't know, this Friday is no ordinary Friday - it's Friday the 13th. I don't usually believe in all that bad luck malarky. I don't look out for four leaf clovers and I certainly don't carry around a rabit's foot or a horse shoe (what's the deal with all the feet??) Let alone touching wood. I mean it's touching wood. Seriously, how is that going to help?

BUT. I can't help feeling a sense of impending doom as this Friday the 13th of ALL Fridays, I have to give a presentation to the Board and Chief Exec. AND I have to drive up to Milton Keynes to do it. Why can't they come to meeee?

I'm pretty nervous, although Mr Chief Exec (he's a newbie) was in the office the other day and agreed with me that we should change the working week to two days on, five days off. So I think it'll all be alright.

Call yourself an Escalator?! You're just an overgrown flight of stairs!

I've just realised that it's been well over a year since my showdown with the escalator at Kings Cross. And I'd just like to point out that I still have the scars on my legs.

But I prefer to call them battle wounds.

Life's a movie

Driving to work this morning I went passed a pair of men's work boots, jeans and other items of clothing strewn across the middle of the road - I thought that only happens in the movies!

That was at the beginning of my journey. Two hours later I arrived at work. Thanks to the downpour last night a bunch of country lanes got flooded - damn those windy lanes. So I had to travel miles and miles to get to work, crossing rivers and motorways (well big puddles and the M3) - all with just one measly bar of petrol left on my gauge and the MoonPig song stuck in my head (no amount of radio can get rid of it).

It's official. I miss the snow.

Tracker Bar Outrage

My desk drawer is permanently stocked up with important things like post-it notes, staples, screen wipes, business cards, cuppa soups and tracker bars. The latter two being the most vital to my working day.

But the other day my tracker bar caused me no less than SHEER OUTRAGE.

I had gone back to the good old chocolate chip bars after finally admitting that buying the raisin version doesn't actually make them (or me) any healthier - when the work experience girl pointed out that the bar inside the wrapper was in fact half the size of the packaging.

SHEER OUTRAGE I tell you! I'm calling a boycott (just after I finish my last pack...)

R.I.P Barney

It was a sad day on Monday. I was driving to work in the morning, when lo and behold, Barney had turned into roadkill. So long my roadside chum.

To block, or not to block...

There are two types of companies. Those that block facebook, and those that embrace it. Oh yeah, and those that allow you to use your 'quota time' minutes to login to it. Pah. (I'm currently working in the latter environment).

I think it's a big mistake for organisations to start blocking these kinds of websites. Sure, go ahead and block the porn, but don't take away my social networks!! Although it's generally the view that by blocking certain websites staff productivity will increase (oh I've seen the graphs), I disagree.

We'll find a way to waste time. We'll chat. We'll go for a little walk. We'll make 10 cups of tea in a day. We'll then go to the bathroom just as many times. We all need a break away from work every now and then, even if it's just 5 minutes to check your webmail (yeah that's been blocked too!!!)

Instead of blocking potential distracting websites, companies need to embrace them. Set up a blog, create a wiki for your team, start a facebook group for your staff, get linkedin. Give employees a way to communicate and engage with each other beyond board meetings and group emails.

Otherwise they'll just end up pointlessly ranting about it on their anonymous blog like me.

So that's my mission in my new job. To turn around a whole organisation's way of thinking and help them see that the web really isn't that scary after all.

Let the battle between IT and Marketing begin! (eek)

The lifecycle of Leona Lewis

Seriously, what is Simon Cowell doing with the Leona Lewis brand? I know, I know, why try and re-invent the wheel. Vocal acrobatics worked for Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston, and given that Leona Lewis pretty much sounds exactly like a hybrid of the two - it makes sense to go down that route.

She's had number one's internationally, so it's obviously working. But it's just such a shame that she's being slotted into a power ballad box with the occasional 80s sounding pop track thrown in for good measure.

It's just so boooring.

Sure, I know nothing about the music industry and how it all works, but I'm a consumer dammit, so here's my prediction of the Leona Lewis Lifecycle (ooh):

1. Starts of with the big voice singing the big songs in the big ol' predictable dresses.



2. Speands a year in the US working on her next album



3. Becomes an 'independent woman' and releases next album, spouting lines in interviews such as 'This album is definitely edgier and funkier and I feel it really reflects me as an artist'. Possibly fires manager.



4. Decides that she'd like to try her hand at acting. How hard can it be?



5. Stars in a Hollywood film in which she plays a girl from the 'hood' who wants to make it as a singer and says things in interviews like 'I really felt a connection with a character and really feel that this whole experience has helped me grow as an artist.'



6. Launches her own range of fragances and/or underwear and/or clothing line.



7. Makes the fatal decision to appear in Celebrity Big Brother. It's all over.

Oh we've seen it all before!!

(but I'm sure she'll be fab)

I'm bad luck for black cats

Over the weekend I did something that wasn't very good.

I know it's supposed to be bad luck when a black cat crosses your path...but what about when you step on one?

Yes that's right. I stepped on a black cat!!!

I was carrying a box out of the front door, and naturally being a Stick Girl, any box is a big box for me. So, thanks to the box, I couldn't see where I was going and totally missed the cat curled up on the front step. Until I stepped on it and in ran into the house and back out again in a panic.

Poor cat.

Although on the plus side, it's lucky it got stepped on by a Stick Girl and no one else.

I think the only sensible answer to this little episode is to get people to carry things for me from now on. For the cat's sake.

Alternative Transport

I saw a rickshaw on my way to work this morning:



In Surrey.

Hmm...

Times a-changing

A lot of things have been changing lately.

First off, I've moved into my flat. Yes, I've made the move to the suburbs! My drive to work consists of 20 minutes of winding country lanes and lots of trees. Lovely. And on my way home, the same pheasant crosses the same road at the same every day. We're becoming friends.

I think I'll name him Barney.

Anyway. Much more importantly - Pizza Hut is rebranding to Pasta Hut. What's that all about?! Is this really a good idea??? In an attempt to answer this truly global question, The Schizophrenic Hut is running a poll on their website to find out. Current votes stand at 29% loving Pasta Hut, and 71% clinging onto Pizza Hut.

I have a feeling this might all be some cunning marketing ploy to get our attention. They'll change back to Pizza Hut. You'll see. It's a classic case of Choco Krispies - and we all know we'd all rather have a bowl of Coco Pops (boom boom).

StickGirl's back

I think the longer you put something off, the harder it is to do - hence the two month gap between this post and the last.

I started my new job two months ago and absolutely love it. In fact things have been so rosy that I haven't had anything to rant about in two whole months. I drive along to work in the morning listening merrily to Johhny and Lisa (my aerial's a bit buggered, can only pick up Captial FM) and enjoying the travel updates informing me of delays on the tube, strikes on the buses. Mwah ha ha. Although I am trying to fit in a bit of road rage to and from work and manage to get a few lines of 'stop driving up my f*king arse' in every week.

It's quite surprising how much extra time I've had on my hands, what with the lack of ranting and all. I went to sunny Madrid, drank sangria, ate tapas and did lots and lots of shopping. I've also been looking for somewhere to live. And at the end of the month, I'm officially becoming StickGirl in the Suburbs. Yup, clean air here I come!

Really must get round to changing the title of this blog...

In at the deep end

Today was my first day in my new job - and yes, I did swear a few times at idiot drivers who don't know how to indicate or stay in their lane - but overall, it was definitely a much needed breath of fresh air.

As with any new job, I have definitely experienced information overload today. So I've just been making like a sponge and going with the flow.

Although I do think I've been thrown in at the deep end a bit. Tomorrow I have to be at work at 8.30 to attend an external meeting with my Director, in place of the Head of Marketing and Comms. Eek. This also involves an hour long car journey to and from the meeting with the Director - that's two whole hours people! Bigger EEK.

Hum...bring it on!

And then we came to the end

So that's it. It's all over.

As of today, I no longer work in the city. No more hour long journeys travelling to and from work in the make shift sauna that is the tube.

Although my lovely work chums did buy me a copy of The Piccadilly Line: An Illustrated History, so I will never really forget the fun times me and the old purple line had over the last one and half years.

I packed up my Whack It and was on my way!

And now I have four long days to start getting nervous about my new job...eek.

Can facebook groups bring about change?

I really wish I could put an end to poverty...


Aha!

I'll create a facebook group - that'll do the trick!

I don't know about you, but I seem to be getting invited to an increasing number of facebook groups that begin with the words 'I bet I can find 100,000 people who [fill in the blank]'. Typically these can range from grandiose worldwide humanitarian/political/ethical issues, to which BB contestant you hate the most (all of them).

Some of them no doubt are worthwhile in recruiting members and getting people to take action by signing a petition or writing to their MP etc. And if these groups get big enough to make it into the press - even better.

But some of them just seem to exist for the sake of it. Like, for example, 'I bet i can find 1,000,000 people against Abortion'. Yes, I bet you can, seeing as facebook has almost 124 million unique users. Pretty easy bet if you ask me.

Although after having a nosy around that facebook group, I do think that it opens a good forum for discussion and provides a place for people to air their views.

The real question is, can these groups really bring about change? I suppose time will tell...and awareness raising is the best place to start.